The Five Types Of Musician On Facebook
8 CommentsMay 21, 2010 – 1:43 pm
Facebook has allowed us to connect to our friends, communicate like never before and allow big business access to our private data. It’s a wonderland. It has also allowed us to become close personal non-friends to musicians. I have helpfully grouped these Internet dwelling musos into useful groups so you can spot them in the wild…
1. The Whiney Little Bitch
Nothing is good enough for this miserable fucker. Their entire existence, to them at least is constant torment. Their only ray of light in their self perceived crapsack life is their own favorite highly unpopular sub sub sub genre, which of course, their band and very few other bands play. Between moaning about their home town scene, or lack of it, more popular bands and how they suck and the mundanity of their hopeless little life, occasionally they will link to their own musical output. Don’t bother clicking on it though. They’re miserable for a reason.
2. Sir Linksalot
Walk away from Facebook for even a few minutes and your news feed is filled with links. Most likely to YouTube videos of bands that have influenced them. Often accompanied by misspelt comments explaining that the band in said clip is a LEGEND!!11! or that the music in question is a Fuckin CHOONN! How they get any music written between the day long link sessions is beyond me.
3. The Constant Inviter
Despite the fact that Facebook allows you to show your location, this enthusiastic type will persist in inviting you to whatever gig they are playing. I may well be ensconced in my London pad, as it says on my profile and latest status update, but that will not put them off inviting me to a gig someone in Scandinavia. And they won’t just invite me once. Oh no. Poking, status updates and all the rest all trying to their their friends to gigs in faraway lands. Give up.
4. Rehearsal Room Reporter
Bands don’t practice in front of fans for a reason. Rehearsals are usually quite dull, full of miscommunication and arsing about. If fans could see their favourite bands locked in the rehearsal room their opinions of their musical gods may change. Especially if the singer is trying to explain his idea
“Yeah, a sort of chugga chugga riff, but, like, not dull, you know, like maybe in like 5/4 time or something”
So reporting on these goings on will reveal the dullness of being in a band to all and sundry. But some feel compelled to do it. We do not need to know about how you nailed that solo, or worked out a great drum pattern. And for the love of god, we don’t need to hear your shitty lyrics
5. Failed Musician Turned Blogger
So you couldn’t cut it as a musician for whatever reason. Probably because you were a talentless sucker. So you do what hundereds of you kind have done. Slag other bands off on the internet. And instead of keeping it to the confines of your shitty blog, you feel compelled to spread your half thought out ideas on ’social media channels’ because a ‘guru’ told you to. Unfortunately one of those ’social media channels’ is Facebook, so the rest of us have to put up with links to godawful reviews and opinion.
Yes, this is me.
The Record Player@Concrete – 1979
0 CommentsMay 17, 2010 – 4:51 pm
Normally here on DT we avoid clubs and stick to real, actual live music, but it’s Saturday night in London Town’s most self-consciously hip district, which usually means cocktails in a former bomb shelter surrounded by pencil ‘tashed hipsters. But despite the lure of Deep House and hen parties at nearby Axis, we’ve managed to get ourselves down to Shoreditch High Street, avoided trying to sneak into Shoreditch house, and made it into Concrete for a night of retro thrills courtesy of new concern The Record Player….
RIP Ronnie James Dio
0 CommentsMay 16, 2010 – 9:39 pm
Sad news just in tonight that legendary metal vocalist Ronnie James Dio has passed away after losing his ongoing battle with stomach cancer at the age of 67.
His wife and long time manager Wendy left a message on Dio’s official website for fans today:
Today my heart is broken, Ronnie passed away at 7:45am 16th May. Many, many friends and family were able to say their private good-byes before he peacefully passed away. Ronnie knew how much he was loved by all. We so appreciate the love and support that you have all given us. Please give us a few days of privacy to deal with this terrible loss. Please know he loved you all and his music will live on forever.
- Wendy Dio
Although his Dungeons & Dragons imagery and diminutive stature occasionally led to ridicule, Dio was widely regarded as a true professional by fellow musicians. From humble beginnings playing trumpet and bass guitar in the late 50’s and 60’s his distinctive vocals helped define the sound of late 70’s heavy rock during stints in Rainbow and as Ozzy Osbourne’s replacement in Black Sabbath – he had recently reformed with members of Sabbath and was intending to tour under the ‘Heaven & Hell’ moniker – and he is widely credited for popularising the distinctive ‘devil’s horn’s’ salute familiar to rockers worldwide.
Ronnie also fronted his own band and became America’s number one touring act during the mid-80’s, and despite wavering fortunes continued to tour consistantly to the last.
On a personal note, we here at DT would like to extend our sympathies to Ronnie’s family. Having crossed paths with the man on several occasions over the years, he was a dedicated and genuinely pleasant individual who created some of the most singular and influential music in metal and his presence will be keenly missed by friends and fans alike.
Bang Your Head for..Jesus??
0 CommentsMay 14, 2010 – 4:56 pm
One day, long after man has departed for the stars, we’ll gert tired of posting up stupid Slayer cut n’ pastes…but not today I’m afraid.
