Since it’s massively disco-balled rejuvenation a couple of years ago, KoKo is ostensibly more suited to the likes of last night’s Guilty Pleasures disco than ravenous Viking metal, but with a hugely bass-heavy sound, it remains the venue of choice for the discerning – or half-deaf – metal fan.

Entombed are up first after for some trademark death n’ roll, and despite having nurtured a sound that, by it’s very nature seems designed to fall apart, are incredibly tight and focused tonight. A quick visit from Amon’s Johan Hegg livens things up, but L.G.Petrov is a growling machine, bellowing out Wolverine Blues and Chief Rebel Angel like his life depnds on it. Usually, Entombed can be relied upon to perform a raucous, ramshackle headbanging exercise, and while L.G seems to be slowly morphing into the metal Shaun Rider, tonight they come across as an accomplished, polished death metal machine, with a great sound tightening things up with thrilling results.

Headliners Amaon Amarth are clearly reveling in the massively upped profile they’ve built over the past 3 or 4 years, the enormous version of the ‘Twilight of the Thunder God’ making you realise just how bloody ridiculous they are- something the band clearly know and exploit. Dressing more and more like rock stars and clearly enjoying the status, the music is always slightly formulaic but never less than enjoyable – it says a lot for the pure charisma of the band that they can take four-four melodic death and keep it enthralling from start to finish.

Tonight we’re promised “a night of surprises” – which begins with ‘Ride of the Valkyrie’s ‘ being dedicated to “The Ladeez” and ends with some cello and a slightly-out-of-place double header with L.G returning to the stage, bizarrely reminiscent of Mark Wahlberg’s performance in ‘Rock Star’.

The theatrics continue with dry ice aplenty, scorching red mist for ‘Death in Fire’ and a fantastic run-through of ‘Cry of the Black Bird’, Amon Amarth is a band on top of their game and they know it. If they can avoid becoming overly sanitised then based on tonight’s performance, they’re set to rule the death metal roost for years to come.

Day two at Bloodstock and we’re up early, either avoiding a hangover by magic, or still quite drunk. Unfortunately this means we have the displeasure of catching Uncle Rotter’s set. Frankly an embaressment to metal. Featuring song titles designed to shock, but only resulting in disappointed facepalms from the early risers – Uncle Rotter’s ‘*ugh* ‘Disco Metal’ brings the first wave of sickness in the morning.

Thank the gods of metal for Wolf. Bringing the highly polished steel of 80’s heavy metal to the stage they blow away the stagnant openers away with a harmonised twin guitar attack and vocals straight from the Judas Priest big book of screaming properly. Getting a morning crowd to yell something as ridiculous as ‘All Hail Caesar’ at the top of their lungs is a feat worth celebrating. All hail Wolf!

Although only catching a little bit of The Haunted’s set – I can extrapolate. Pure cut down clever-thrash intensity. Dolving stalking the stage like Rollins remade in Sweden. And razor sharp riffs cutting through the air like giant ninja stars.  Oh, and a pit that leaves a few black and blue. Awesome.

LG Petrov of Entombed gets the party started in rock and roll style. Running around the stage and headbanging in his own awkward drunk-uncle-at-a-party way, while being backed by what looks like the most stylish band in death metal, they bring the big fist banging songs needed on a hot day. An excellent and fun set – but no ‘Say it in Slugs’ or ‘Stranger Aeons.’ Boo to that. Yay to everything else.

Kreator! Wow. While Slayer get old, fat and sloppy, their German counterparts get fucking crazy. Songs are tight, vicious things mostly culled from their newer (and strangely for a thrash band) better albums, but when things get old school – Mille Petrozza gets very old school too. Flag Of Hate gets probably the most impassioned, insane  go-out-and-kill-everyone-who-is-not-true-thrash introduction seen outside of the 80’s! It’s over the top, it’s stupid, it’s the most metal thing I’ve ever seen. Luckily they have the songs to back up the words – Kreator go down a storm!

And that’s when booze destroyed memories. Go elsewhere for Cradle of Filth and Blind Guardian reviews – Because I can’t remember them!