So. Delirious. Who? What? More importantly, why? Well – this is rock for Christians: rock with roll, sex and drugs removed using surgical precision. Music to speak in tongues to.

If you switch your head off (not that I’m making any judgements on Christians generally *cough*) this band are okay. Good tunes, great vocals and lord knows they put spirit into it (a ha ha ha ha)…

The problem is, it’s really, really hard to look at it from that angle, because the religious message is so brutally hurled at you. They rammed it into my head so violently I had to keep touching my face to see if there was blood on it. I’m listening to it now and I literally can’t fit any more annoyance into my body. For an atheist, it’s immensely angry-making.

There are so many aspects to it that illustrate the point that I stopped making a list after track two. God Is Smiling – I mean, how do they know? God-cam? Lyrics like ‘when hearts are broken, love unites’ display a twee discordance that reveals incredible naivety, setting the scene for what is a highly vomit-inducing album.

However, Christians really get off on this stuff. What do you think? Is God smiling? Personally, I think he’s making sick-noises.

I chose the song above because it’s on this album, but as a whole their videos are very well-watched, revealing a surprisingly large Young Christian community. Just think. These people are everywhere. They could be your friends, your cousins… Either way, they’re going to be crushed when they find out that Delirious are planning on splitting up at the end of this year. Personally I’m thinking of hosting a small party, which may or may not involve goat-blood pentagrams, drug-taking, condoms and self-harm.

I digress. For your amusement/horror, here are some of the comments about Delirious that are splattered across various disgustingly earnest YouTube videos:

I love this song! its so beatifuL! I luv Delirous! There AWESOME! And AMAZING!
Niomefive

this is a very good song i luv it if you keep doing this God is going to be very happy with you GOOD JOB!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
feedfrenzy

WOW. I cant stop jumpin for God. RAIN DOWN ON ME
rubenramirezsuarez

And so concludeth the lesson.