This is what being metal as fuck is all about. You may have a terrible job holding a sign for a pizza place. But that does not stop you from ROCKING THE FUCK OUT.

When life give you lemons CRUSH THE LEMONS IN A FIST OF METAL AND BANG FOR SATAN! FUCK LEMONADE! ROOOAAGGGHHH!

Occasionally I get sent mail from bands who want me to review their stuff, or embed their video or say nice things about them for some reason. I don’t often do it because on the whole, they are depressingly boring.

But yesterday I got an email that contained this…

We made the video ourselves and it’s basically a battle between a robot and a wizard (homemade costumes). In the video there are fireballs, russian roulette, sword fights, massages, a dog with a cape, breakfast etc…..

It’s actually pretty badass!

And I knew I was onto a winner. I love the fact that they follow ‘a dog with a cape, breakfast’ with ‘etc’ – Yeah, that’s right you know, dogs with capes, early morning meals, the usual, you can sort of guess what’s next… Brilliant.

This came from a genuinely delightful indie pop band Hotel St. George

I checked out the video. It did indeed include all the aforementioned stuff and defiantly rates as ‘badass’ The video reminds me of staying up til 3AM watching videos on MTV2 to try and find something new to impress my friends with.

Which is good.

One day I’m going to get sick of funny metal covers. Until then, you’re going to have to bare with me. Sorry.

First Slipknot and now this. I would drop some serious money on an album of this.

Continuing today’s theme of utterly mind bending ridiculousness from Europe we present Italian Electro Poppers Nerd Foilla Covering a song about a horse originally created by Flash-Video-Novelty-Song-Overlords Weebls Stuff.

It’s catchy innit.

I’ve always had a soft spot for Peaches. She just seemed dirty, but in a good way. Not the Christina Aguilera way, but a wholesome, fun kind of dirty. Smutty even. Like a rude postcard playing electro. However, now she seems to be morphing into the mum of the one vegetarian kid in school, you know the one, always wore over sized wool jumpers and smelt a bit like soil.

But we can forgive her that. Because of LASERS. LOTS OF LASERS.

It seems that Peaches wanted to make her live show more awesome, and went down the only obvious route. Six laser harps. Built by a strange German man who looked like he’d have no problem cooking and eating a man he met on the internet.

The show actually looks pretty amazing, but I know I’d be tempted to throw stuff to break the beams and mess up the song. Because I’m a dick like that.

Anyway, I’m hoping for more laser based instruments. Hopefully Johnny Borell or whoever is the hate figure du jour will shoot themselves with a high powered version.

Video comes courtesy of Vodaphone 360 and VBS

FLAIRS – TRUCKERS DELIGHT from 3rd Side Records on Vimeo.

A while ago we wrote about the best animated music videos. The list, we are sorry to say was WRONG. That is, the list is wrong now. Because of the quite amazing 16-bit meets Robert Crumb video for Flairs – Truckers Delight. Funny and quite ridiculous, it is amazing.

The song is quite good too.

Daito Manabe must have some understanding friends. How else would he be able to convince them to attach electrodes to their faces that make them twitch along to his music?

Strangely hypnotic. I’d like to see some of today’s mope-pop blandlords attached to this kind of device. With a much higher voltage…

He’s gon be the numba wun hustla, but he don’t get no respec from his ho’s yo. DT thinks it knows why, but far be it from us to comment on the greatest Hip Hop video of all time, from surely-soon-to-be-massive rap-leprechaun Boostalk.

VBS usually uncovers some interesting bands. Italian freaky-upbeat-popsters Ex-Otago are one such band. What an interesting bunch of chaps!

Muse decide that lipsyncing on Italian TV is not for them. Hence a band member switcheroo, and general larking about.

Iron Maiden on German TV decide not only to do the switcheroo, but also to swap instruments in mid song. Look at (guitarist) Adrian Smith, trying to maintain professionalism while all around act the arse. I kinda feel sorry for him.

Milli Vanilli – the gimps with a chimp, show off their talents for lipsinc until ‘Girl You Know It’s True’ starts to skip.  Those four words and a contraction of two will haunt them for the rest of their lives.

Ashlee Simpson – Well, she just plain fucks up. Apparently the wrong song started playing, but instead of mouthing along to her own material, pulls a confused face, does a ig and wanders off the stage…

Nirvana out Morrissey Morrissey with their TOTP version of Smells Like Teen Spirit. Krist Novoselic does something with his bass and Dave Grohl does what drummers do…

More excellent remixing, dubbing, mashing up or whatever monkeying around with a video for the LULZ is called these days.

This time it takes the form of angry teenager’s favourite band Slipknot having their song ‘Wait and Bleed’ covered in the style of the Jonas Brothers, Miley Cyrus or whatever other terrifying future popstar the House Of Mouse has grown in a vat. Kudos goes to YouTube user Andy Rehfeldt who has a nice line in metal mash up videos.

Cue teenagers with parental issues crying ‘blasphemy’ in the comment box, and everyone else having a good giggle.

…yeah, it’s been slow on the news front this weekend.

But never mind! What you see above is a fan-shot video of rubber mouthed rock dinosaur Steven Tyler of Aerosmith falling off a stage in South Dakota. Watch him go! Point – point – dance – spin – DOWN.

According to bastion of reliable reporting – Twitter – Steven broke his shoulder and had stitches in his back and head.

Back in the eighties I’m pretty sure Tyler, thanks to his superhuman drug use would have got right back up and finished the show, tour and gone at least a year before finding out he’d broken a bone.  Now – the whole tour is in jeopardy.

What you see above is a band who are either very, very clever or monumentally thick. Thick to the point of non-functional. So thick, in fact, that they cease to function as normal humans and simply begin to mill around making grunting noises, dribbling and, in this lots’ case, styling their hair.

They are a band called Raygun. Unheard of until today when this video started doing the rounds on the blogosphere – cheers Popjustice – the hilarity is derived from the plummy public school accents spouting self-assured guff about their utterly bog standard musical output. They are, in their own words:

Iggy Pop, James Brown, David Bowie and Shirley Bassey in a lift

High praise indeed. Well it would be if it hadn’t come from their own eye-linered, smug faces.

The highlight of the video comes I think when the singer spouts this stream of twaddle, ending on a high note.

Be at home, knocking up some beats on Reason or Logic or Ableton or whatever… and then we kind of get together and mash two types of songs, a hybrid of style really. Delia Smith. Psychedelia Smith.

Psychedelia Smith. A contrived phrase so monolithicaly wanky, even one-note punchline Nathan Barley would feel ashamed for using it.

Either this is a highpoint in viral marketing for a clever band, playing the media to get coverage, or a group of cock-ends coddled by industry insiders into believing their own hype and sniffing each others farts.

The takedown notice by management on the original video makes me think it’s the latter.